Happy summer solstice!
What a time in the year to have some contemplative moments in our lives. (btw did you know that the word “contemplation” is related to the word “temple” meaning that every time you contemplate life, you are doing something sacred, so allow yourself to immerse into contemplation mode).
For me it meant that last night I tuned in to listen to Eckart Tolle live on YouTube but I fell asleep! (it was late where I was). So today I listed to Russel Brand´s interview with Eckhart Tolle “Become Awake Now!” Just wow, this man is so full of wisdom it blows my mind. I recommend listening to this this very much.
I have listened and learned from Mr Tolle for a couple of years now, about the Power of Now and power of Presence. Very powerful yet in its essence quite simple stuff.
His teachings about present moment and letting go of ideas of what should be and letting go of the attachment to ego-based living very much echo Buddhist teachings too, Buddhism has been an important philosophy in my life for many years now.
My own approach to love, relationships, life, sexuality and intimacy have very much been shaped by these philosophies.
My work as a Coach also stems from these philosophies: learning to let go of what you think you should or shouldnt do/behave in dating & relationships, especially based on age, gender, race and sexual orientation.
Instead of holding on to a certain idea / label of what your relationships should look like, my work is about learning to be open to different situations and different people. Being open to looking beyond the expected and/or normative ways of thinking. Letting go of heavy “pursuing” or “needing to have this” or “have to have this by this age” etc.
It is about learning to find Your own Way.
This way of looking at life, love and relationships has slowly offered me more peace and more clarity and more balance in my own life. The relationships in my life (and I mean all kinds of relationships, not just romantic) are positively evolving, some relationships have been left behind because the possibility of evolving wasnt there from both sides, this too I consider evolution, when we are able to let go of people and relationships that arent meant to be there at that moment.
Don't get me wrong though, by no means am I now living in total harmony, no of course not, I still fall back to the old rabbit hole every now and then, I fall back to something that for many years felt familiar and gave some sort of “comfort” but in the end didn't let me grow.
The difference between now and let's say 3 years ago is that I don't fall so deep, nor do I fall so often, and most importantly I have learned not to beat myself up for falling, because every time I lift myself up I recognise the trigger of why I had fallen, and every time I am more accepting of my past, more accepting of who I am right now and therefore more capable of enjoying my life as it is without an attachment of what it should be.
As a result of applying this kind of philosophy every day I feel more free from labels, more free from expectations and more free to have the kind of life, love and relationships I want.
This is what I do with my Coaching, I help others on that very same journey of finding freedom in their Love, Life and Relationships.
If you struggle with dating, love and relationships, you feel great anxiety about not having achieved certain things with it and just dont know what to do, I feel your pain, I have been there and I also know it is possible to have a better way.
Now is the perfect time to start figuring out that way for You: summer solstice, time of renewed energy, time of renewal, time of new journeys to begin.
Finishing with a quote from Eckhart Tolle about love: “Love is a state of being. Your love is not outside, it is deep within you. You can never lose it, and it cannot leave you.”